How do I consciously develop my mindfulness?
We hardly have time for ourselves in stressful everyday life. We work and forget to be careful with ourself and the partner. Some things just go unnoticed because you are too busy with yourself. Some people change their lives after a stroke of fate or a critical situation in which they have fought for their lives. Those affected have recognized what is really important in life and have made significant corrections. Those people speak of having received an inner wisdom after the dramatic cut in life. You feel spiritually enlightened and develop a new mindfulness in life. But not everyone has to or wants to experience such a dramatic event in order to awaken inner mindfulness.
Discovering your own inner mindfulness for yourself and your surroundings is not witchcraft. But it takes your will and your conscious perception. Close people, like your own partner, need your mindfulness very much. If this is lost, the relationship can be broken. Women in particular suffer when they are ignored by their partner and are not attentive. It’s not just about whether the new hairstyle was noted. Because the emotional level is also important to stabilize the relationship in the long term.
The following five points can help you develop mindfulness. Anyone who pays attention to it can be inspired.
Take the time to understand the people in your life. The problems of others that are not yours should also be taken seriously. Even if you think the problem is small, take care of it. Make sure that you empathize with the partner. In any case, it is the wrong way to say that the problem is not important. Try to be empathetic and share your partner’s worries. This is the only way to develop the necessary mindfulness and react to your partner.
2. Observe and determine
Not everyone likes to talk about their worries. However, you can determine with great care whether the partner is doing well or not. Notice whether his behavior has changed. Maybe he is no longer talking about a topic that previously bothered him. Or he talks too much about it. Anything other than before should get your attention. Because maybe something is changing at your partner at this moment.
But other abnormalities can also be a sign that your partner has a problem. Radical changes in visual appearance, new friends or a complete withdrawal from society can be evidence. New hobbies and leisure activities can also indicate that the partner is changing internally.
3. Stop and then act
Before deciding on an action, pause for a moment and think about whether that is correct. Sometimes we act spontaneously and forget the consequences. It is possible that the decision was good for you, but harms another person. Mindful actions are also necessary when you see that someone needs your help. If you really want to live mindfully, you can also help when you don’t have time.
3. Listen properly
Those who learn to listen properly develop mindfulness. We often listen only superficially while you are doing other things. Important information is lost because you have not listened properly. Pay attention to what was not said. Because this can be an indication that this topic is difficult for your partner. Sometimes something should be kept secret by not mentioning certain things.
Your partner’s voice also tells you a lot about his emotional state. Is it loud and nervous or quiet and barely audible? All of this gives you information about how your partner is doing.
On the other hand, it is important that something always becomes a topic. Even if you yourself believe that it is a minor matter. Note the repeated statements as they may contain important information. If your partner keeps talking about how nice it is in Spain, be aware. It is conceivable that your partner is thinking about emigration.
4. Pay attention to your own words
A harmless joke, made your partner cry? You can’t always find the right words. And it is possible, that you can emotionally hurt a person without intention. But if you know the partner well, you know which topics are difficult for him. Does your partner have problems with their weight or appearance? Then make sure that you are careful about these topics and don’t make jokes about them. Promises that you make without knowing whether you can keep them are also important. If in doubt, phrase your sentence differently so that it is not a promise but a declaration of intent.
5. Body language
A person’s body and gestures tell you the truth. Analyzing body language can help you track down stealth issues. This primarily includes the movements of the eyes and hands, which provide information about whether you were lying at the moment.
The postion of sitting and legs tell you whether your partner wants to leave the room straight away. Uncertainty and nervousness are often associated with hand gestures that seem casual but provide a lot of information. The body also tells you whether your partner is comfortable or the situation is causing them discomfort.
Mindfulness for yourself
It’s not just about being mindful of your partner. You also have to take care of yourself. Therefore, always stay in the reflection with yourself. Am I really well? Do I want to accept the new job from the bottom of my heart? Such questions help you see more clearly and prevent you from repressing things. Your body also speaks to you and provides you with information. Is your neck tense or does your head hurt? Then you were probably in the office too long and should take a break instead of a tablet. Feel in yourself every morning: how is my body doing? How is my mind and soul? And what do I have to do to be balanced?
Watching yourself is the key to discovering mindfulness for yourself. Regular relaxation, wellness or even sport help you to balance. Meditation or yoga can be helpful for inner balance. No matter which method you prefer: don’t do anything you don’t like or because you think you have to do it! It should always match your inner conviction.